Do you ever find yourself replaying snappy comments from work or school in your head? Or perhaps you can’t shake off the sting of a rude remark someone made while you were shopping? If you’re anything like me, these moments can linger far longer than you’d like.

Why Negative Comments Stick

Think about the last time someone gave you a heartfelt compliment or praised you for your personality or work. Now, try to recall the last rude comment you received. Chances are, the negative remark is much easier to remember. This is not just a coincidence but a reflection of our brain’s negativity bias. While this bias might have been useful for survival in ancient times, helping us recognize and avoid danger, it can lead to anxiety and depression in our modern world.

Introducing the Compliment List

In his book, Someday is Today, Matthew Dicks offers a simple yet powerful tool to combat negativity bias: the compliment list. This strategy involves noting down every compliment you receive, whether spoken or written. By consistently recording positive feedback, you can counterbalance the tendency to focus on negative experiences.

How to Create Your Compliment List

• Choose Your Medium: Use a notetaking app like Notion, Obsidian, or Evernote, allowing you to quickly jot down compliments on your phone. Alternatively, a physical notebook or even a simple text document can work just as well.
• Record Every Compliment: Make it a habit to write down compliments you receive, no matter how small or insignificant it might seem at the moment.
• Revisit and Reflect: Periodically review your list to remind yourself of the positive things people have said about you. This practice helps internalize these positive affirmations and diminishes the impact of negative comments.

Benefits of a Compliment List

By actively engaging with your compliment list, you can foster a more positive mindset. Here’s how:

• Encourage Gratitude: Acknowledging and appreciating compliments cultivates a sense of gratitude, further enhancing your overall well-being.
• Boost Self-Esteem: Regularly seeing a compilation of positive feedback can enhance your self-esteem and self-worth.
• Reduce Anxiety and Depression: Shifting your focus from negative to positive experiences can alleviate feelings of anxiety and depression.

Conclusion

Negative comments can linger, but they don’t have to. By creating and updating a compliment list, you can focus on positive experiences. This simple habit can brighten your mindset and help you embrace a happier, healthier life. Start your compliment list today and let positivity lead you to joy and confidence!